Monday, June 20, 2016

Chasing Dreams

The thing about "chasing dreams" is that it is actually a chase. You have to run full force at what you want, or else, it gets too far away from you.

I have always had the passion for writing. I got my first poem published when I was in 2nd grade, and I knew then that I wanted to have more and more of my writing in print. I knew that I wanted to use my passion to influence others. But, here I am at 28 and I'm still nowhere near where I want to be.

I notice that oftentimes I get geared up to make something happen. I commit to doing what I need to do to "get my name out there". But then, life happens. I find myself going through the motions. Of course, I have two beautiful kids and a husband that need me and I devote a lot of my time to them. And I devote time to keeping the household running smoothly. And then, I devote time to developing another career so that I can have a day job that helps pay the bills. And when all is said and done, I don't have a lot of "me time" and I find that I spend it watching TV and being lazy. It's become a bad habit because now that I do have a little more time to myself than I did when the kids were babies, I still don't spend that time being as productive as I'd like.

That being said, my passion for writing is unwavering. And no matter how many distractions there are, I always come back to it. It's been a constant in my life for as long as I can remember. It is therapy to me. But to have the thing I am passionate about become the thing that produces financial stability for my family, to have my works recognized and share my passion with others--that is my dream. And I am chasing it, even if I'm not running as fast as I'd like to be.
This week I have begun working with a friend to illustrate some of my children's books. I am so excited to see my ideas come to fruition, and I hope that this gives me a leg up when submitting to publishers.

I have also gotten back into the groove of submitting poetry for contests and publication. Even in situations that feel like a long shot, I know I need to try, because trying and failing is better than not trying at all.

In looking for some of my best poems, I began thinking about what writing does for me and what it means to me, which inspired a poem of its own.

So here I am, still creating..still trying..still chasing. This is so integral, so important in my life. And I won't give up. :)