Saturday, December 18, 2010

I'm just waiting.

I know it has taken me forever to do this 30 Day Challenge. It's been a few months since I started, which is really depressing that I can't even keep up with something for a month straight. I've noticed as an adult that I feel dumber than I used to as a teen. lol. It might sound funny, but I'm serious. I know I'm intelligent, but I'm oh so scatter-brained and forgetful. I've always been a procrastinator but I've realized that I have no amount of self-starter in myself and it makes me a little mad. I used to feel like I could do anything I put my mind to and that my mind was a wonderful thing. Now I just feel like it's just kind of there..getting me through each day. I'm in school, but I need to figure out something else to do to apply myself. It's extremely sad when I can't even complete a task that is supposed to be fun. I feel like I'm just going through the motions. Don't get me wrong, I love my life..I just wish I valued my personality and my talents as much as I used to. I feel like..jello. Just jello. J-e-l-l-o. It's alive.
Anyway, I need to do something in order to light a fire under my own tail and finish the things I've started. This blog holds little importance in my life but writing is something I love to do. I should put more time into it.

I know the next daily challenge is for me to write about my day in detail. Now I'm just waiting for a day that's worth writing about. Oh, I've had them, for sure. But, it seems like the only time I remember this is on days that I've just been sitting here at the apartment, cleaning, doing homework, changing diapers and filling up sippy cups. I don't want to write about a different day, because, well..that would be lying. lol. So, hopefully I can catch myself on an exciting day and get through the next part of this challenge so I can complete it..and then possibly start another one with a bit more gusto.

1 comment:

  1. I kind of feel the same way as you. I used to feel like I could do anything and then deep down I have this fire to do all the things I want its like blurp nothing there but I still have motivation if that make sense? When it comes to the work I just don't do it. I can't even describe it honestly because it makes no sense but in my head it does. I would say just keep trying and you if you miss days its still all good because at least you tried to get a little better ya know.